Drasko Djenovic, minister for the Belgrade church, Serbia and Montenegro: “It is not 'healthy' to live in a virtual world. Since many sick people are on the Internet we cannot be 100 percent sure who is on other side of the global village. Because of that we do not recommend people try to find a spouse (through the Internet).

“On the Internet we all can be much better than what we are.”

Lawrence Okorafor, church member in Newcastle, United Kingdom: “Yes there is a stigma about using the Internet to find a spouse. The relationship might be built on false premises. The partners often know too little about each other before making commitments and there can be impostors on the prowl.

“However, there are still good sides to it, because I think it is an easy way of getting into relationships — especially for people who have a fear of rejection and (difficulty) talking face-to-face with the opposite sex.

“Online dating tends to break down that barrier, thereby creating room for the man or the woman to feel more at ease when an actual date is arranged.”

Mark Miller, young adults minister for the North Atlanta church: “I think some people think it's (an act of) desperation — that you can't or won't find the right person, so you're led to look online. But then again, it's just another tool to meet new people.

“Many people have used friends and dinner dates and other various means to meet new people, and this is another tool to introduce people.

“Online dating comes with a risk, just like dating does.”

Online security

The Internet is a haven for sexual predators, pedophiles and other unsavory characters. Has your site encountered any problems with such people? How have you responded?

Jim Foster, administrator of churchofchristsingles.com: “This is something I take very seriously, and this is something else I pray about daily.

“Each user is truly anonymous to the other users. The advantage is that you can decide if the other person is trustable with any additional information as you go.

“Once you get to the point of sharing e-mail addresses, we recommend NOT using your work e-mail address (often this is too descriptive — first, last name, sometimes even your work location). This really is the best line of defense.

“Once you are past that, we do have other tips (available on the Web site).

“The longer I do this, I’m also starting to think that if things are getting serious between two folks, they should do some serious research via marriage license checks, felony checks etc. There’s so much you don’t know about someone when you haven’t grown up around them.

“The issues we have experienced with this have been fairly minor when you consider the numbers of people we’ve had on the site — mainly things like users that weren’t as they claimed (divorce not final when they said it was, someone lying about their marital past, etc.) and sinful/inappropriate behavior.

“I credit us not having many problems to both God and to our users being savvy to the issue.”

’Cautious acceptance’

How do members of your church (married and unmarried) regard the Internet when it comes to dating? Do they see it as a helpful way of meeting people or as a dangerous haven for predators to be avoided?

Diane Walls, member of the MacArthur Park church, San Antonio: “I have taken a few guys to church I have met (online) and I tell people I met them on the dating site. Most people kind of look at you funny, but they soon realize the person is a very nice person.”

Dean Barham: “I would say their attitude is in between these two extremes. The words ‘cautious acceptance’ capture where I think most of our students are.

“Most students in our ministry certainly see the norm as dating in the typical way and would approach online relationship connections with some initial skepticism.

“But this is a generation that likes to keep its options open, so many of them would never close the door completely on any avenue that might help them find a mate.”